wahaha. i hated today's so-called gathering. wat bullshit. made me feel like an orhpan. -_- h.a.h.a. watever lor. just throw me there and "nahh go intro urself la". wtf. wat? i'm performer ah? intro myself? so where is the stage? -_-

good lor. placed me in a place where i feel damn uncomfortable, out of place and lonely. with ppl screaming away on mic, dancing and swaying away together, right beside me. my pr skills only come into good use when the other party is willing. i felt damn loser can. like as though i'm an orphan there.

yah and stop telling me the who's daughter got scholarship to study uni. the who's son is studying medicine overseas. yah go ahead and be proud of other ppl's children. and be ashamed of me, ur daughter (prolly not after all). and go tell other ppl my horrible habits at home. whenever someone say something nice abt me, u will deny it. i'm nothing but just a pile of nonsense to u. everything good i do is nothing. every mistake i make is WORLD NEWS. when i do badly for exams in sch and cried like mad, u said i'm giving u stress. i wanna do well so much to gain ur approval. but haha. bullshit. making to the uni is not enough.

sitting there made me see how every other child is being loved by their mom. moms talked to them nicely, smiling so kindly. and it makes me feel damn sad. u would rather be nice to other ppl's daughter, celebrate her 21st birthday. and lock ur own daughter outside the house on her birthday. THANK YOU SO MUCH. i feel really really loved.

seriously, to me, u totally sucked as a mom. if i were to rate, u're negative on the scale. cuz u hurt me too much. and u made me cry so much and so many times. even now, i feel damn heartbroken.

God, give me a mom who loves me without any condition.